John

1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
1 tbsp lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup of nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle of Tequila

Sample the Tequila in a large glass to check quality

Take a large bowl, and check the Tequila again, to be sure it is of
the Highest quality. Pour one level cup and drink.

Turn on the electric mixer, Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy
bowl.

Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.

At this point, it's best to make sure the tequila is still ok, so try
another cup.

Turn off the mixerer thingy.

Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Pick the frigging fruit and damm cup off the floor.

Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers,
just pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the tequila to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Check the Tequila.

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts

Add one table.

Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.

Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.
Don't forget to beat off the turner.
Put the bowl through the window, finish off the booze and make sure to
put the dirty stove in the dishwasher.

CHERRY MISTMAS TO ALL!

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