| Never having done such a thing I can't be of much help but just thinking out loud I might generate some ideas for you.
I would make a male and female die, as you suggest, but think about what has to happen when you deform the metal. As you cannot create nor destroy matter it has to go somewhere so the basic principle is that the die must have enough clearance to allow for the volume of material in the plate.
Obviously the clearance at the sides must be at least the thickness of the plate but you are actually going to deform a much wider circle of plate into the flange so that excess material has to go somewhere. Basically I think you need a lot more clearance than the thickness of the plate!!
I would also make sure that you don't introduce any sharp corners so good radii on the plug and the female piece and obviously a dished shape would be strongest.
Just a few thoughts.
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