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Old 19-01-2008   #1 (permalink)
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The Gnats System of Measurement

Extract from the CARDIFF MESenger:
The Gnats System of Measurement

This system has been in use for many,many years for moving and positioning large objects such as Stonehenge and the Pyramids to the latest CNC machine Tools. Lately it has fallen into disuse as no direct metric equivalent to a "smidgen" has been found.

1 Gnats Whisker = 0.000" to 0.005" or less (i.e. a light gap).
2 Gnats Whiskers = 1 Gnats Doodah.
3 Gnats Doodahs = A Gnats.
4 Gnats = a Smidgen.
3 Smidgens = a Little Bit.
2 Little Bits = a Bit.
3 Bits = a Tad.
2 Tads = a Move It (left or right).
5 Move Its = That's the Wrong Way.
Too many Wrong Ways = Collect 'P45'.
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Old 20-01-2008   #2 (permalink)
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Yep that sounds about right
but you have to include

"Cock on"

and the saying...
"Its near enough"
("We dont want it near enough We want it right")
"It is right"
("Well thats near enough then")

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Old 20-01-2008   #3 (permalink)
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For Marine Engineering purposes replace 1 Gnats Whisker with 1 Midges D*ck.
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