When you care to send the very best.

**GEEDUBBYA** · 13-08-2006

Howdy Guys,

Have ya ever been at work and one of your buddies recieved an "Occupational Restructuring Opportunity" (he got fired)? Well thats a really awkward moment....I mean what do you say to a person when that happens? Sure there are the old cliches like, "They are losing a great man". But everyone can tell there is no truth behind that kind of statement. Now you can find just the right words in a case like this with one simple click of your computer mouse to http://flatrock.org.nz/topics/workin...ting_cards.htm

Find phrases like:

You've been a great employee,
So diligent and true.
But there is no "i" in "our team,"
And now there is no "u." "

or

We realise that on this solemn day,
A part of our company goes with you.
We strongly suggest that you put it back.
Signed, the guys in Security.

or possibly

Your work was really wonderful,
But we have to boost our stock.
We're really sad to see you go -
Please don't rampage with your Glock.

have a good evening all,

Greg

tigertc · 13-08-2006

sounds like someone going "postal" for the last one.

**Bunkerbarge** · 13-08-2006

Ous always start with "It is with mixed emotions........"

73north · 28-08-2006

" what's the difference between a Lada and a sheep ? "

answer - you would rather be seen coming out a sheep .

**rjwood_uk** · 29-08-2006

lol great site greg...just read down the site and found this!!

Why I Fired My Secretary
I woke up early, feeling depressed because it was my birthday, and I thought, "I'm another year older," but decided to make the best of it. So, I showered and shaved, knowing when I went down to breakfast my wife would greet me with a big kiss and say, "Happy birthday, dear."
All smiles, I went into breakfast, and there sat my wife reading her newspaper, as usual. She didn't say one word. So, I got myself a cup of coffee, made some toast, and thought to myself, "Oh, well, she forgot. The kids will be down in a few minutes, smiling and happy, and they will sing 'Happy Birthday' and have a nice gift for me."
There I sat, enjoying my coffee, and I waited. Finally, the kids came running into the kitchen, yelling, "Give me a slice of toast! I'm late! Where is my coat? I'm going to miss the bus!" Feeling more depressed than ever, I left for the office.
When I walked into the office, my secretary greeted me with a great big smile and a cheerful, "Happy birthday, Boss." She then asked if she could get me some coffee. Her remembering my birthday made me feel a whole lot better.
Later in the morning, my secretary knocked on my office door and said, "Since it's your birthday, why don't we have lunch together?" Thinking it would make me feel better, I said, "That's a good idea."
So, we locked up the office, and since it was my birthday, I said, "Why don't we drive out of town and have lunch in the country instead of going to the usual place?" So, we drove out of town, and went to a little out-of-the-way inn, and had a couple of martinis and a nice lunch. We started driving back to town, when my secretary said, "Why don't we go to my place, and I will fix you another martini?" It sounded like a good idea, since we didn't have much to do in the office.
So, we went to her apartment, and she fixed us some martinis. After a while, she said, "If you will excuse me, I think I will slip into something more comfortable," and she left the room.
In a few minutes, she opened her bedroom door and came out carrying a big birthday cake. Following her were my wife and all my kids. And there I sat with nothing on but my socks.
Source: Letter to Ann Landers

**Bunkerbarge** · 29-08-2006

Brilliant, I bet he wanted to forget them from then on!!

**wonwinglo** · 29-08-2006

Very good RJ ! thats a classic one.